Show: Covert Affairs.
Story Title: The consideration coda.
Character/Relationships: Annie Walker, Jai Wilcox, Ben Mercer, soldiers / Annie/Ben.
written for the usa_las (last author standing)
Summary: Within Annie's mind, as the credits were about to roll.
Warnings: Post-death fic.
Annie Walker was in the helicopter as it took off, leaving the combat zone behind them. Safe, by any objective interpretation. But the body in her hands, beside her breast, mutely argued otherwise.
Her ears told her how high she is. Even if there were an ocean below, and not a city on an island, she knew she was too high to do anything and survive doing it. That left her with two options: talk to Jai and the officers of whatever branch of the U.S. military who were manning this helicopter. Or sit and think.
And Annie was in no mood to chat.
Just as well, Annie thought to herself, looking at what physically remained of Ben. I need to decide, at least for my own sake, where you stand, and took a much-needed breath, assuring Jai “I’ll be fine,” when he asked, knowing she had to decide before they set down in whatever airbase was closest.
Points against you, Annie began, thinking of the start of this latest shootout. ‘The truth is complicated,’ Ben had told her yet again when she had found him making deals with a terrorist, after he railed so vehemently against ‘CIA hypocrisy’ and wanting to save that doctor from that same terrorist.
And then there was the marina. Where were you? You tell me not to trust Joan, then you send me into the den of an arms dealer?
And back to Sri Lanka. Did I really turn you? Were my words sufficient to make you abandon your oath? Or was I an excuse, no more, for you to go rogue?
Annie knew there were positive things about Ben… but it took an effort to avoid the Wilderness Of Mirrors - he’s trained to play on an asset’s emotions, to elicit the response he needs fought hard against it was real. In the words of the man who had been hunting Walter, it was the one true thing. God, listen to me, already using word substitution, she thought with an amused smile.
By the time Jai said, “Buckle in, Annie, we’re landing in a few minutes,” she had made up her mind.
“Okay,” said Annie Walker of the CIA.